Crazy....

For 2 times in a row....
I've sat in this bus with a crazy lady

She board the bus while shouting and scolding people.
This continues on for the entire trip!!

ok.... the entirety of my trip in any case, cos I get off earlier...

Image from: http://www.cartoonstock.com/directory/v/verbal_diarrhea.asp

I have no idea what disagreements she had with the world
But her scolding ranges widely from Men, Women, Children, the different races, certain ethnic groups, foreign workers, savings, God, Christianity and Buddhism, Tiger beer (today!) and many others.
I even caught one Caucasian smiling with amusement at her ramblings.

I was irritated the first time
My quiet sleepy bus journey has turned the other way round once she board the bus....
Today, I was more.. pitiful.... of her...
I was praying in my own way of certain issues I am facing
Then when I saw her, I started praying for her too

I do not know why....
There was a certain compassion and an urge to help her through prayers.

And I am not even a devout Christian or anything.... =/

I just hope that the prayers will still be answered!

Image from: http://www.churchinwales.org.uk/faith/prayer/

Morbid...

Met with Unca the other day
Had a morbid topic discussion
Cos it just so happened that we passed by a cemetery after tracking at Bukit Timah Hill and the tombstones are all covered with grasses and weeds....
They were lopsided and didn't seem to have anyone or any descendents maintaining them...

The descendents may have forgotten that they even have ancestors in those graves as their parents pass on..
I know for my side, my parents have never even brought me to my grandparents urn resting area to pay respects. Thus if and when they pass on, I will never know where my grandparents are placed...

And we started to talk about what to do with us when we die...
I would want to be just cremated and my ashes spread over the sea...
Save the trouble of buying a lot and maintaining it...
I do not think I'm ever going to get married and thus the idea of having descendents seems impossible....
So no one is going to pay their respects to me anyway....
saves time and trouble if the ashes are just spread over the sea...

Unca wants his to be donated to the University for their medical teaching.
Noble idea yes
But I somehow do not entertain the thought of displaying my body or the body parts for others to view at, despite being dead...

According to Unca, the ferry at Changi ferry terminal to Pulau Ubin have this service (spreading ashes over the sea)!!
I must find some time to go write my will then.... hmmm...

Image credit from: http://www.atlastours.net/holyland/sea_of_galilee.html

Drifting off....

Friendless...

Maybe it's just me
Maybe whatever I do, just don't cut it
I'm just not suitable to be a friend
Even when I try not to intrude
Try not to get involved
Try not to ask....
I still get rejections and get hurt....
And people started asking...
Why not you just ask...

Well... when you get non-committal replies or even no replies
When you feel like you are intruding
When you feel you are outside the circle
Will you still want to ask?

I did all those in the beginning..
but gradually, a person do get tired
I'm not exactly the happy person I may appear to be
I can't take things easy anymore
Prob due to a human's limited life span

I still want to live love laugh
But all seems to be escaping, slipping from my grasp
When will I be free?

From http://www.flickr.com/photos/selvikrishnaraj/6032345200/sizes/l/in/photostream/

Vein bruise?

So it went from looking brownish on the first day to purple-ish brown green on the 3rd day...
It actually looks worst than it seems in the photo just that the photo can't actually capture the discoloration.

And I must say, it's the most painful and inconvenient one to date!!
I can't really stretch my arm..
Touching it causes pain
Using strength cause pain too....
What kind of bruise is that!!!!

There was a vein bump thingy when it first appeared.
I din take a pic then cos I was still in the midst of class
Then I use my wrist band to cover and protect the area
Now it's "beautifully" colored... =_='''

I wonder how long it takes to heal...

The bruises on your skin can heal easily
But the bruises on the heart can never heal properly...
Hiaz...

Insensitive?

Insensitive? That's actually a first
I'm usually thot of being TOO sensitive
I see a lot of things as a hurt or damage
I considered too much about others that even though I'm hurt inside, I still do things for people...
I guess I still wanted to believe in "you reap what you sow"
Even though I'm not exactly "reaping" it...

But a simple message is seen as being "insensitive"?
I guess I'm still hurting from it
Even as I am typing this...

I know that there was tonnes of messages that day
But how would I know what an individual will feel?
I'm not the person....
Some people would think it's funny
Some people would just ignore the whole thread
Some people would get angry which you did and being on text, who would know?

Yes, you just got back from a leisure trip
But that doesn't mean that I deserve an insensitive remark just cos I texted asking how many in total were there and then an "ignored... =( " message the Next Day.
I texted next day and not that nite leh
Still insensitive mah?

Insensitive is when you ignored the feelings of others
When you do not care...
When the time I asked for confirmation on going out for my birthday and nobody actually replied me. Instead, all talked about some random stuff....

I think i should take a break and become a hermit...
Dun go out for any activity liao

Wondering...

Sometimes, I wonder if it's just me
or is it tt the strangers tt I've met are never the right one

Sometimes I wonder if it just me
Or this group of friends i have, are just not the right ones.

Concern, consideration, a simple question
Things tt should come naturally when u are frens, doesn't seem to appear here.
even a simple reply takes eons...

I give up..
I have to learn to let go...
Be free...

Graciousness

I was in the bus earlier today
carrying 2 full bags
yet when the passenger behind me left his seat
It was taken by the guy standing beside me....
*pissed lah!*

I mean...
He doesn't look ill or anything
He's only carrying a haversack that looks super empty
and his breakkie
he really need the seat so much that he must snatch it from me meh?!

I seriously don't understand...

It's on par with cases where people turn a blind eye to pregnant or elderly people...

Sometimes, I just want to kick them...

And as one gets older, one gets bolder...

Oi! move lah!

Work...

work is piling up...
Struggles to have a work life balance
goal to leave work latest by 6.30pm seems difficult
this only happens if I have an appointment in the evening
But faces the workload the next day again
I'm not that capable..
or rather... I do not wish to immerse myself in work fully with no time for other stuff...

Oh well..
Life goes on...
Can't sustain a lifestyle without work...

Where are all the cushy money earning job that allows u lots of time to rest and relax?! hrumph...

Rashes...

My legs seem extremely prone to injuries
They are easily bruised
I have more bruising pictures but I didn't post them....
And now they are developing extremely itchy rashes..

I dun know where these rashes came from!
I couldn't sleep properly cos of the itchiness of the rashes...
And they create ugly red bumps on my legs.
Le sigh...

how to cure?
Why and how did they appear?
I only had a family lunch and a BBQ in the evening leh
Is it cos of the grass? mat? food? ....?

Tired... ZZZZzzz....

Post...

Yes.. I deleted the last post
Cos...
Despite all..
They are still my friends...
They already know...
Cos I have already said so...
I dun wanna continue to hanker on

=)

All's well... =)

Rain...

Rain
It can be a good or bad thing depending on what you are doing

Like if you travel, you will wish for sunny days or at most gloomy days.
But no rain please.
It will spoil your photo-taking opportunities
Makes it difficult for you to appreciate the scenery and enjoy the shopping

If Diving, while I'm already wet, and will be in the water where a lighting strike (should?!) do no harm, I still do not want it to rain as it will be cold and dangerous still. Light drizzle is fine, but not all out rain!

If I'm going somewhere, no rain please
I do not want to get wet getting to my destination
Or need to hold a wet umbrella wherever I go

However, if it's at night and I'm already in bed
Or if I'm in a confines of a building,
Then it's okay to rain!!
Especially for the first one, bed....
How nice, comfy and cooling it is to nestle in bed, covered by a blankie.....
ahhhh... bliss....

I miss my bed already....
Hahahahahah!!

Travel...

I have always loved to travel
I dreamt of being a pilot, air stewardess/flight crew, tour leader, business woman, etc.
Professions that allowed me to travel..

But as I settled into my current profession, I discovered...
It does not allow me to do so...
The companies that I have been to, does not require me to travel
No doubt friends and family who travel for work says that business travel is a tiring affair,
I would still like to try

I tried to interview for flight crew before
but was rejected
I tried only once as compared to the number of girls who actually tried many many times.
I was doing it for fun at that time anyway,
as I was going for further studies soon

I tried the tour leader position but was told that only confirmed employees can lead tours
But my manager refused to confirm me and even told me that she doesn't think that I will stay in the profession long.
Fine... I left..
Miserable pay, long hours, throat infection....
and even having to work while you are nursing a throat infection (can't talk at all and you need to talk to sell)
And getting scolded if you dun have enough sales cos the people at your table takes a long time to decide (my fault?! I'm supposed to push them to make a decision?! never mind...)
Pushing factors that made me leave..
And guess what's the funny thing? The said Manager saw me again when I was with another company and ask me to recommend sales, products for her. She was trying to get business for her new company through me... duh...

So what do I do?
I travel for leisure.
China, New Zealand, England, Australia, Taiwan, Hong Kong, Indonesia, USA, Thailand, Malaysia, Japan, Korea, I have been there. =D
But of cos... I do not have the $$ or the time to explore the entire country.
Just certain parts of the country. =)
Time for more traveling!

Breathtaking...

Breathtaking pictures from my Live Onboard (LOB) trip.
This was before Bali and before the (so angry) Tioman trip.
Whilst there was lots of nauseous feeling due to the rocking of the boat that cast a vile shadow on my diving trips henceforth, the breath taking dusk scenery tried to make up for it. 

Simply beautiful and something which we will not get to see often
And I have simply no idea how it was formed. heh!

 Trying to make a panaromic pic...

 Composition of photos all trying to capture the colors / essence of the sky.

 It's the DAWN (dusk) of a New Day!! hurhur!

Trying to capture a closer look at the colors...

Good food?

Was at a training at Traders Hotel a short while ago.
While the food, especially during breaks, is excellent,
And they really kept us well fed and well hydrated
Too much good food is urm... not healthy...
hahahah!!

Cues after lunch syndrome that drags on the whole day
Our trainer calls it "graveyard syndrome..."
and the last person who answer the questions, will be suffering from "creeping Death"
LOL at all the terms.

And if the good food at the buffet is repeated day in day out, it really gets very boring....
But good cos it makes u zoom in on the food u want and eat less bah....

Here's a pic of the buffet area, the conference area and our wonderful tea break items!!